Preventing Online Cyberbullying

In today’s world, tweens are just as likely to play out their freindships online as they are in person. So how do you keep your kids safe online and prevent cyberbullying? First, what is cyberbullying? It’s simply bullying tactics – like hazing, teasing, and harassment moved into the online world, using social networks, email and instant messaging. Kids are often cyberbullied by someone they know and not as many parents believe, by some stranger.

That is why it’s important that you hone your online skills to help your kids stay safe and learn to recognize cyberbullying.

First off, it’s important to understand that you can’t shut the computer out of your house totally. In today’s technologically advanced world, your child needs to be familiar with computers, the internet and how to use the technology to type, search and yes, communicate with others.

Kids are just as likley as adults to use the internet to find a peer group where they feel they can fit in. A girl interest in Nancy Drew might find kindred spirits at a Nancy Drew fans site – and never face any danger. On the other hand, bullies abound in cyberspace and internet access may lead your child into the wrong (virtual) alley way.

So how can you be sure that the computer is being used for good and not as an instrument of cyberbullying or harm?

1. Put all the computers in a central place – This doesn’t mean you have to watch your child every minute of the time, but especially when your children are just getting started, keep the computer in the kitchen or family room where you can easily glance at the screen and has the added benefit of keeping the family together.

2. Create a family internet plan – Sometimes schools have their own plan in place – if so, leverage this and adapt your plan from theirs. If none is forthcoming, then ask for it. If there isn’t one, draft your own, covering amount of time the computer can be used, acceptable sites, and accpetable forms of use – shared email, shared IM… etc. If you do allow your child his or her own email account or IM, be sure to use your own email as the back-up contact and keep control of the passwords – if your child changes a password, you’ll be informed.

3. Say no to strangers – Strangers on IM or email are a No-No. Keep a watch on the IM friends list and your kid’s emails. As they get older, you can relax on this, but makes sure they do feel comfortable telling you if they get a strange email or IM – and show them how to block people.

4. Create your own accounts – You can always create your own Facebook or MySpace page and friend your kids – that way you will be able to keep tabs on them – just promise to steer clear of writing messages on their page to save them from embarassment

5. Discuss what you click on – Take the time as a family to discuss what you found on the internet -the same as you would talk about school activities.

6. Internet Research Projects – Now that Google is a verb, use this to your advantage. Use Google to look up answers to questions, research projects and settle questions. Research together, or have your child “man” the computer and relate what she finds. Consider keeping a log of your internet research findings.

With a little work and monitoring you can safely allow your child online. Just remember that cyberbullying is just the same as bullying – check Instant Messages, Social Networks and emails for signs that your child is a victim of cyberbullying. In some cases you will have to let the issue work it’s way out. In other cases, you may need to step in – but the key is to know what’s going on.

For a safe online tween-friendly environment, check out GirlMogul Magazine’s Insider Club – an online community for tween girls with great content, eBooks, games, challenges and giveaways as well as online book club.