Cyberbullying Action Steps

Hi Moms – have you been hearing more about cyberbullying – are you wondering just what it is and how you can protect your kids from it? Well GirlMogulMom.com has enlisted parenting expert Joe Bruzzese, M.A., author of the essential guide A Parent’s Guide to the Middle School Years to decode this troubling practice for us. Check out the second in our series on cyberbullying by Joe. See the second article in the series here.

Action steps for parents

1. Share observations. Sharing statements like, “You seem sad today” or “This seems like a rough week for you” may open the door to a conversation with your child.

2. Investigate. Outside of weekday mornings and evenings, a parent’s time with a child is often limited to a few quick phone calls and weekend activities. Sharing a conversation with adults who see your child on a regular weekly basis fills in the gaps of what you might be missing. Connecting with teachers, coaches, and mentors can be an invaluable source of information about a child’s life. If concerns arise about your child’s behavior, turn to this group of adults for insight.

3. Make contact. A casual argument between friends doesn’t call for a heated visit to the school’s front office; however, when arguments turn physical or include verbally abusive statements don’t hesitate to schedule an appointment with the school counselor. Bring the evidence you have from your observations as well as any conversations with adults who regularly interact with your child.

4. Avoid the Papparazzi. Coach your child to stay clear of impromptu cell phone camera shots. An innocent shot, snapped quickly between classes can eventually find its way into a bully’s hands.

5. Report it. The moment you become aware of a threatening email, or see anything online referencing your child in a negative way, report it to school administrators and law enforcement officials. Collect any abuse communication (emails, instant messages or text messages) that could be used to document bullying behavior.

Bringing bullying to an end takes a team effort. Schools and law enforcement agencies have risen to meet the challenge of keeping kids safe, but the brunt of the burden still falls on the shoulders of victims and their families. Through a continued effort to identify and report bullying incidents, teens regain self confidence and move toward a happy and healthy future.

Joe Bruzzese - Middle School Parent Coach

Joe Bruzzese, MA, is a nationally recognized parent education speaker, university professor and author of A Parents’ Guide to the Middle School Years. Visit www.ThinkingForwardTV.com, to purchase the book, DVDS and to schedule parent education presentations at your school site.

Cyberbullying – School Yard Taunts go Virtual – Part I -

Cyberbullying - the Newest Online Threat

Imagine arriving home to find your child beaten at the hands of a school yard bully. Cuts and bruises highlight the physical abuse inflicted just beyond the watchful eyes of school officials. Long before the bruises appeared, your child suffered a far more destructive form of abuse. Text messages, YouTube videos and a foray of abusive posts on MySpace broke your child’s confidence long before the bully’s sticks and stones ever did.

Once viewed as harmless teasing, cyberbullying (bullying through the use of electronic devices) now accounts for the majority of abusive behavior among teens. Taunts and threats formerly confined to written notes and conversations in the halls now flows freely from one cell phone to the next before finding their way online and into a chatroom or onto a MySpace page. Nationwide, two-thirds of teens have had “mean, threatening or embarrassing things said about them online,” according to a survey commissioned by Fight Crime; Invest in Kids, a national nonprofit organization of law enforcement, The survey results revealed another, equally startling finding. The majority of cyberbullying cases are never reported. When asked about their reluctance to report bullying, teens shared their fear of losing internet access or their cell phones as a possible consequence if their parents became aware of the abuse.

Stay tuned for Part II Here

Joe Bruzzese - Middle School Parent Coach

Joe Bruzzese, MA, is a nationally recognized parent education speaker, university professor and author of A Parents’ Guide to the Middle School Years. Visit www.ThinkingForwardTV.com, to purchase the book, DVDS and to schedule parent education presentations at your school site.

The tweenage years bring inevitable tough questions, and though moms may be blindsided as our little angels ask about condoms. The fact is daughters want and need to talk to their moms. The key for moms: answer matter-of-factly, as best you can, and remain calm, so your daughters will return with more questions. Then invest in this book, a fast read and humorous guide with 113 questions girls and their moms routinely ask—or should be asking– about topics ranging from sex, bodily changes and dating.
With sample conversations and real life stories, this books opens the way for answers from mom rather than peers (the blind leading he blind) or worse yet, the media “Putting the facts on the table and learning from one another may be the best gift a mother can give her daughter to protect her future health

Is Valentine's Day Too Much Pressure for Kids?

Hey, Moms. With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, it’s very important to address some pressures kids may be facing in school and in social settings. Expectations are high, and everyone is expected to have a valentine or express their feelings for their crush. Everyone goes out there and looks for someone to exchange gifts with, or to just share the day with. This leaves most kids feeling left out when their friends and classmates around them all have someone to share the day with but they don’t. A strong support system at home is important to establish not as a novelty, but as a constant reminder of a source of attention.

One tip I have is that you can remind them that the importance of Valentine’s Day is not only about being with your significant other. It’s perfectly fine for someone to exchange gifts with their friends and/or family members. You can perhaps go to a nice dinner or cook dinner together at home. It’s a great way to spend time and cook up some delicious Valentine’s Day desserts. It might also be a fun idea to go on a shopping trip in the mall together. My favorite memories, however, come from those small DIY projects that are easy and affordable. You can decorate anything from t-shirts to cupcakes, or buy some beads and make each other necklaces.

Girls face pressure everyday in and out of school; and it is hard enough for a young girl to juggle school, homework, friends and family. The last thing a girl needs is to feel worse and have to worry about not having a Valentine on Valentine’s Day. Talk to them and make sure they aren’t feeling alone. I like to make plans for the day and do something exciting. Be a friend first and then a parent, it will make them feel at ease and the will be likely to open up and share their feeling with you.

Pregnancy Pact Movie on Lifetime TV

After news report hit the nation, I, like many other Americans, were shocked to find news of a so-called “pregnancy pact”. Teens, girls no older than 16, did in fact commit to getting pregnant at the same time. This story was a controversial fiasco, with its heart in Gloucester, Massachusetts. According to the Time article that brought this chaos to light, the school nurse practitioner had administered over 150 pregnancy tests by May, with girls being disappointed when the test came back negative. The small town had a fierce Catholic majority, and had a very difficult time coping with the teen pregnancies and with the press. Naturally, Lifetime remade the entire happening into a made-for-TV movie.
So, I was interested. I went to the Lifetime website and watched the film, entitled “The Pregnancy Pact.” I have very mixed feelings about this film. Initially, I thought it was just okay. It was a bit cheesy, but I think that was the nature, and the fun part, of watching a Lifetime movie online. They did a good job of setting up the story, and did follow it quite accurately. They covered the abundance of pregnancies, and had a view into the girls’ personal lives, through a blogger from the big city who moved out of Gloucester. This blogger appeared to be a real liberal, with obvious past history that was a “mystery.” She played the voice of reason for most of movie, trying to instill a sense of purpose and ambition in the girls. About ¾ of the way through, things started to become, well, weird. We find out things about the blogger’s past that indicate that she did not practice what she preaches, and how convoluted everyone was in the town. On top of that, the movie ends with a sort of push toward pregnancy. It was honestly startling to me. Although they show a bit of pain and some bad cases, the main pregnant teen covered in the film has a happy ending.
Ultimately, I think this film actually glorified teen pregnancy to some extent in the end. For hat reason, I would advise against watching it with your child, but would suggest watching it just for general interest.

A recent poll by the Kaiser Family Foundation study shows the average kid between the ages of 8 and 18 spends 7.5 hours a day online. Struck by the numbers, I decided to conduct my own “study” to see just how much time my tween daughter spends in front of a screen — – be it a computer, Ipod or TV on a typical weekend day.

Do Tweens Spend Too Much Time Online?

8:30 am – 10am: Woke up, came downstairs and turned on the TV. Watched The Suite Life of Zach and Cody On Demand followed by Tru Jackson On Demand, followed by iCarly On Demand while eating French toast sticks.

10am – 12pm: With television still on, pulls the laptop out and begins emailing friends, checking her Kidzui account, culminating in a game of Wizard 101 for an hour.

12 – 1pm: Finally (with much coaxing from Mom) leaves the couch, gets out of PJ’s, makes bed.

1pm -1:30pm: Pokes around the house, has lunch.

1:30 – 3:00pm: Plays with little brother.

3:00 – 5:00pm: Turns television on again and grabs laptop. Interactively plays Club Penguin with her brother who is on the other computer while also watching Disney Channel.

5:00pm – 6:00pm: Plays Wii Fitness (at least now she’s off the couch).

6:00pm – 6:30pm: Has dinner with family.

6:30pm – 8:00pm: Watches iCarly and Tru Jackson.

8:00pm – 8:45pm: Goes up to bed, changes and reads a book.

In the 12 ½ hours my daughter was awake, she was online in one form or another for 8 hours! That’s six hours longer than what is recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics and five hours more than I feel good about. Next weekend I’m pulling out the kitchen timer and setting some limits!

With the holiday season approaching fast, everyone is busy buying gifts, decorating their homes or planning on what to cook for their big holiday meals. One item on that list for most people is the mouthwatering pumpkin pie that we love so much during the holiday season. Nothing can substitute for the traditional pumpkin pie dessert served after a hearty holiday dinner. Well, all you moms out there, there is apparently a need for you to stock up on those canned pumpkin that are required for making a pumpkin pie for your family before they run out.

The article I found states that we might have a shortage in all the canned pumpkin pie products that are required to make our pumpkin pies in this holiday season due to poor weather conditions. The rain has hurt the harvest of pumpkins greatly and due to this very reason, Nestle, which according to the article supplies most of the countries canned pumpkin products, has met with a shortage in their pumpkin supplies. They have decided to not supply any more pumpkin pulp for this coming holiday season. You may think that there must be other alternatives for getting pumpkin products out there but interestingly enough, according to the article, “Nestle is the largest national brand for canned pumpkin products, with 80 to 90 percent of the market”. With that being said, this shortage of supply is sure to affect the mass public looking for canned pumpkin products this season.

The company is hoping for friendlier weather and a better harvesting season next year. Although Nestle has taken a hit, consumers still have a few options remaining. According to the article, Whole Foods Market Inc. is expected to have enough of its store brand product and also have shipped more product this year to stores than it has in the past. Consumers may also make their pies from fresh pumpkins or just switch to a different brand if available in the market. For all the pie makers that are looking forwarding to making their pumpkin pies better, I guess we have to stock up quickly or find other alternatives. I’m curious to know if this is really a scarcity in the product, or if it is a scare to boost sales. What are your thoughts?

Then at the party, the girls and moms get together, watch a video, donate money, have a good time and help another girl. Tea Party Angels provides complete tea party kits and the parties can be hosted at home or a tea shop. We think it’s a great new idea for birthday parties or just because…

The kit comes with activities (like t-shirt making and quizzes) as well as the educational video plus step by step instructions on hosting the party.

And like we said this weekend, their kick off party is happening in NYC this Saturday, November 7th at Doubles 783 Fifth Avenue, New York. Christie Brinkley and her daughter Sailor have signed up as hosts. Ticket prices are $150 for moms and $75 for daughter…and you can get a $20 discount on your ticket just by RSVPing directly to info@teapartyangels.org or by calling (212) 876-7092. You can find out more about the group at www.teapartyangels.org